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Wednesday, 7 April 2010
How NOT to draft sewing patterns
Topic: Cats, Catz and Kats

The tools required to draft sewing patterns can be pared down to four of five simple, easy to find items, a tape measure, a long ruler, a T-square, a pencil and large sheets of paper.  Really, you don't need more than that. You don't need drafting tools, expensive curved rulers, or those spinny round things that help with angles.  And you absolutely 100% do NOT need a cat to help you.  Cats are wonderful companions but they know nothing about pattern making, so having one on the table while drafting patterns is more of a hindrance than a help.  They don't hold down the paper to keep it from flying off the table, and their paw marks will not help you find that last cross mark, indeed, dirty paw prints can look like cross marks and they can cause your side seam to be three inches to far to the front.

Last night I was trying to make a few men's shirt patterns for Dave. cotton madras plaid shirts are in all the stores right now, but I refuse to pay 75$ for something made from 4$ a yard fabric from Len's.   I don't know if I want to make a casual convertible collar in a standard fit or an adapted tailored fit dress shirt with the stand and fall collar.  I decided to begin by making fashion style drawings then cutting the patterns and letting Dave decide.  Block patterns are always a worthwhile time investment because I can use them over and over and adapt them to many different styles.  I have the classic business dress shirt block that i use all the time. 

When I cleared off the table and brought out my supplies Trixie the Cat decided that it was time for some loving and attention.  She knows that when I am making patterns I will be captive at the table for at least a couple hours and she can have my undivided attention. She considers being swatted, scooted, tossed off the table, and moved out of the way of my metal ruler to be good attention.  And for some reason she thinks being swatted with a short 12 inch ruler is a game, she tried to grab the ruler and yank it out of my hands with her paws.  Then every time after that I moved the ruler she thought it was a game.

She also thinks when I move the pencil it is like chasing a toy mouse on a string, and she believes the the purpose of the shiny silver end of the tape measure is to amuse her. She thinks that pattern paper is for her amusement and that there is no finer sound to cat ears than the crinkle of pattern paper as she flops over on her back and stretches as long as she can. If i don't rub her tummy she moves in closer and does it again where I am working. 

And the worst thing?  When she sticks her butt right in my face.  To cats this is a sing of love and trust.  To humans, well -lets just say it's not something we humans enjoy.  We tend to think it's disgusting.

So I did finally finish my patterns.  I made only one major error and it was Trixie's fault, her paw print really did look like a cross mark, but I caught it in time and fixed it. I needed the patterns  to take to the fabric store so I could be sure that one, the pattern will fit on the odd width of the madras plaid, and two, to ensure I buy enough to match the plaid at the match points.  Then I add 25% more because madras cotton shrinks like a bitch in the first washing.  Fortunately, it's 4-8% a meter and that's really cheap.

Now, it's off to give Ben a hard time.  It's his birthday today. He's 22. I think I'll make some Birthday Jello for him. Or maybe not!


Posted by lincatz at 11:00 AM EDT
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Monday, 7 December 2009
Curcuit Training for Cats
Mood:  a-ok
Topic: Cats, Catz and Kats

And now: And old favourite from long. long ago. This blog entry is originally from March 2003, and repeated because I had to reconfigure some website settings and I don't have time to write anything original or imaginative.

My cat, Trixie, is very health conscious. She maybe be large, she may have a droopy belly, but she does like to be fit. How else will she be able to chase all those little mousies? Her favourite method of keeping fit is circuit training. Many cats enjoy circuit training. But circuit training for cats is different than circuit training for humans; as we shall now see.


Circuit Training for Cats


Find a good circuit

A good circuit should be mostly round, and offer a good variety of terrains, such as table surfaces, chairs and sofas, homework books, newspapers and of course; laps of people.


Warm-up

Begin with the nose. The nose must be in perfect working order, able to detect the scent of pizza embedded in the rug from three weeks ago. Get the muscles in the right sequence, up and down, up and down, and inhale deeply on the up motion. Everything on the circuit must be sniffed out thoroughly so you want the nose working perfectly. Next, warm up the tail. It should be held high and stiff. This is an especially useful exercise for when standing in front of the television. More surface area can be blocked. Finally, warm up the legs. You start at a slow trot, then work up to a frenzied dash.


Begin the circuit.

Trot around room. Hop on end table, knocking over coffee cup. Trot across chair and drop cat hair on book in person's lap. Move to floor again and give table leg a thorough sniff down. Rub face against leg to add personal scent. Hop on coffee table and scatter as many papers as possible. Hop to couch and stick tail into face of nearest human. If human responds stick back side into human's face. You just used your litter box and it's important that the human knows by smell that the food you are getting is digesting properly. Act huffy if human doesn't sniff. Sink your teeth into the huffy act. Literally. Leave when backside is swatted. Trot into a different room. Trot back into same room as humans. Repeat order.


Add Intensity.

Add intensity to workout by placing face in the center of human's attention. This will cause humans to chase you as you go through your circuit again. If there are small humans at a table with books in front of them this is usually called homework. Homeworking humans love when adorable cats come up and lay on their papers. They feel the love you are sending them. Homework papers are softer to lay on that any other surface known to cats. They might be softer and more comfortable than newspaper. After a fraction of a second on the homework you will soon reach your optimum heart rate as your human chases you with increased anger.


Cool down

A proper cool down is important. Usually a cat will find him/herself cooling down in the back porch or outside in the rain until the humans have forgiven you for messing up homework, spilling coffee, and scent spraying all surfaces that haven't been sprayed in the past half hour. Big eyes are essential for the cool down, so stretch out you pupils as much as you can. Once human see the stretched pupils, they will let you back in. Cat science still doesn't understand the effect of stretched eye pupils on humans...but they're working on a theory.

And now for a fun and cheerful Christmas picture:

 


Posted by lincatz at 11:35 AM EST
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Wednesday, 22 August 2007

Topic: Cats, Catz and Kats

SOmething that every cat owner has desperately wanted to know: how good is a cat's memory?  Does it remember last year when you sprayed it with the garden hose?  Does it remember last week when you sprayed it with the garden hose? And will it remember that you --once again, in the same set of curcumstances will will spray it today?

Te answer is what we've always suspected about cats, they have little long term memory.  In fact, their memory is about ten minutes, according to this story!

And that's all for today 


Posted by lincatz at 9:55 AM EDT
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Monday, 13 November 2006

Mood:  silly
Topic: Cats, Catz and Kats

MONDAY THE 13TH!  The only day worse than friday the thirteenth, at least according to Garfield the Cat. 

So what happened this weekend?  On Saturday I went to the kitchener market.  Now that they've chased away all the tourists the market focuses on what's important: FOOD!  No more crocheted doilies in flaming green, no more wood plaques with pictures of outhouses burned into them.  I'm not kidding, there was a merchant who sold wood burned plaques and his best seller was an outhouse with a couple's name on it and the slogan, "Our happy little home"  Now it focuses on food.  I bought some of the best wheat free bread on the face of the earth from "The British Bakery" I also got pizza crusts and hot dog buns.  I had toast with breakfast this morning.  This bread is so good it tastes ike bread, not sawdust.  I don't even need to toast it, I can eat it buttered like regular wheat bread. We got some pork sausage, some summer sausage, tenderloins, bacon, and a whole bunch of veggies.  One compartment in my fridge is now full to the top with garlic, onions, red peppers,  and snow-peas.  Sort of like a stir fry waiting to happen.  We also got 30 eggs and a big basket of red potatoes. 

We also went to Len's.  I got some underlining for my denim, it's nylon on one side and polymerized on the other and the nylon side says "Waterproof" "Windproof"  So this will be perfect.  They also had trench coat fabric; poly cotton poplin weave with a polymerized underside and finished topside.  I like the pale grey better than the beige, which had an odd yellowish undertone.  I also got two meters of fake fur for either lining or for cutting into strips and using as a trim.  It's very long haired and looks like a muppet.  I got some white stretch lace to make a nice top for christmas parties.  I can pair it with a couple different skirts.  I also found a simple white batiste embroidered with some pinky-brown satin thread and sprinkled with some pinky brown sequins.  This will be made into a simple raglan hippy blouse with white satin cord in the drawstring neck.  One can never have too many hippy style blouses.

I finished the paisley shirt-dress.  YAY!  I finished the matching corset-belt. YAY!  All the buttons were half price at Len's so I got the heavy copper buttons that I wanted in the first place.  I gave up on finding the small copper D-rings for the corset and just used rouleux tubes for the lacings.  I got some hook and eye tape and sewed it at the center front.  It's not reversible now, that would have required hand sewing in twenty hooks and eyes right into the center front seam.   No.  Not doing that, and the paisley and blue looks fine the way it is. 

I finished the pinstripe skirt. Using the stretch lace instead of grosgrain ribbon turns out to be a clever idea; the lace grips the waist better the the ribbon, and it's more comfortable to move in.  I cut out a sleeveless top with a flared peplum hemline to go with the skirt. It should take little time to sew as it's just a very basic shape and a style I've made many times before.  I want a bit of a Swing Era vibe to the outfit, and I think it will turn out quite nice.

AND NOW FOR SOME PICTURES! Here's a bunch of Purrty pictures of nature things like skies and waterfalls.  Gosh, I feel the need to put on "Dan Gibson" music.  And if you feel the need to scroll through a bunch of picture "kitten War" style, here's the place:  thefairest.info

And if you need a little laugh, or if you want to see where farkers get all those cute and clever pictures, check out this list of top ten funniest intarweb  pictures. Included are the hilarious invisible bike and the much loved  darth kitty and the one and only jedi squirrels. This is what makes me wake up every morning and say THANK THE FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER FOR THE INTARTUBES!  And here's a whole Fark thread devoted to the other five hundred interweb cliché photos that the top twenty didn't include.

And here's a bunch of funny kitty kat pictures.  my favourite is...all of them!

OH NOES!  More silly Kat Memes!  I'm in UR ____ stealing UR ____ while U _____  This has got to stop.

Enough silliness!  This is far too silly.  Now for something serious.  How do you amuse someone with a mensa level IQ, other than the previous silly pictures, which I found highly amusing.  I'm so happy you asked!  Here's the Mensa gift guide for smart mensa people.  I had a mensa card once upon a time, There was nothing better for squelching a conversation  than pulling out the mensa card and showing it off when contradicting someone's point.  (What are you, some sort of mensa member?  why yes, here's my card.)  Of all the things on that page...i want...um...none of those.  Either I'm no longer mensa material, or the gifts listed are really stupid.  Stupid gifts for smart people! 

Here's a cool little toy that I found on "mental floss"  It's a Mousetrap game that sticks to your fridge!  I think that would provide me with minutes of fun and entertainment.   Or I would also like a USB turntable so I can convert some of my old records to MP3's

So what else is cluttering up the litterbox? Not much.   It's time for me to finish up here and go do some other things.  See y'all later!


Posted by lincatz at 11:07 AM EST
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Saturday, 15 July 2006

Topic: Cats, Catz and Kats
You know those ugly pictures of animals with human smiles grafted onto their faces making them smile like braindead morons. Or american politicians? The really amateur ones, like human descent only with no artistic ability? I found the site, through a request on POE. ALL HAPPY PETS! all happy, all the time! And there's a selection of cafeshop products so you can be reminded or your happy pet! YUCK! I think the two faced kitten in the entry below is much cuter.

Posted by lincatz at 12:58 PM EDT
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Topic: Cats, Catz and Kats
Here's a Kute little Kitty who has a brilliant career ahead of him in politics. With piccy goodness! A rare combination of AAAWWW! And EEEWWW! in one. Twice the goodnes in one little kitty! Although I'm certain on some level he's simply not trustworthy, what with being a two faced bastard! It says he's nursing from mommy, it's a good thing mammaries come in pairs! If you haven't guessed, it's another story of a freak kitten. Enjoy.

Posted by lincatz at 11:58 AM EDT
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Tuesday, 9 May 2006

Mood:  a-ok
Now Playing: 102.9 The Hawk, classic rock, on internet radio
Topic: Cats, Catz and Kats

I have 2 cats. One is named lucky. He's old. We got him sometime around 1990-1991 when the kids were still little. When we got him he was a vicious SOB who would attack without provocation. Or he was a sweet pussycat who wanted a nice widdle rub behind the ears...then he would attack without provocation. when we moved he went into a blue funk, he would sit around, not move much and eat. He started getting fat. So we did the only logical thing. We got a new kitten to keep him company.

Our other cat is Trixie. She's a few tacos short of the combination plate. Her elevator doesn't go all the way to the top floor. But she's cute, she has a triangular shaped face that makes her look like she's still a kitten, even though she's seven years old. She still acts kittenish, trotting around, jumping at the slightest noise and she still has a cute, tiny little mew. She was the runt of a large litter from one of those homes with thirty cats and not enough food. Her favourite activity is finding a warm lap and person to rub her under her chin.

Lucky once had his picture here, on My cat hates you My cat hates you is the location of some of the angriest, most hate filled cats on the internet. A perfect antidote for The daily Kitten

And if that isn't enough to make you say AWWWWW! Here's Things that make you go aaahhhh! filled with things that make you go aaahhh! Needless to say!

Have you gotten enough pussy for one day? No! How about A box full of pussy? Aren't they adorable? How would love a basket full of cute little kittens?

But not all cats are cute as we can clearly see by Clicking on these pretty coloured letters I think I'd be pissed off too, if I had to wear a fugly what not to crochet jacket and cap.

If you prefer to do more than just look at kitten, There's always Rate My Kitten where you can rate a Kitten on a scale of one to ten. And if you prefer a little head to head battle there's always Kitten War!May the best Kitten win!

Let's not forget the legendary cat forums of Cat of the day, where People post in a forum as their cats. Yes, these people try to take on the personalities of their favourite kitty. I'm a cat person...but that's pushing the limits a bit too far! One of the names is "mom2lotsofcats" I think she needs basic biology lessons. Although to be fair, I've caught myself calling myself Mommy to the cats. "Kitty Come here, mommy wants to take you in for the night!"

If you prefer your cats a little less cutsey poo then there's always UGLY CATS! Most hairless cats are ugly, and Here's a site devoted to shaved pussies...er...hairless cats You can see the indignity they feel with every day of their lives etched on their vile visages! Sadly, in spite of the old saying there are no uncute kittens, This page of hairless kittens proves otherwise

And that's enough cats catz and Kats for one day. I leave you with a cute katty GIF for you viewing pleasure.



Posted by lincatz at 10:21 AM EDT
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Friday, 14 October 2005

Mood:  cool
Topic: Cats, Catz and Kats

Short entry today because my hubby is home. He's taking a well deserved day off. He's been working ten hour days lately and it only gets worse in November. Ever since we've been married, I never see Dave during November. It's the month he has to work hardest so all the things he's working on can be tested, finished and put into operation for all those end of year whatevers that the company does. So he's home today.

I almost finished the top I started. I ran out of bobbin thread and because it was 9:30 in the evening I decided to wait until morning to finish. All I have is about four inches of the neck to finish, then knot and clip loose threads, then put in a couple hooks and eyes and I'm done. That will take about ten minutes or so. The lace isn't as stretchy as the lace I used in the original, but that was because I cut apart a pair of lace tights. I didn't have a pair of tights to cut apart so I had to buy lace, and the stretchy lace had a real sucky pattern on it, so I got the less stretchy lace with the unsucky pattern.

Now, for the cats! First a news story from Fark:A cat with two tongues! Complete with slide show of strange pictures! EEEWWWWW! That's weird and ugly at the same time! UCK! I'm pretty much speechless. I bet that cat gets some awful hairballs! And likely twice as many! Now there's a tongue that would make Gene Simmon's green with envy!

And also, have you ever wondered why there are so many websites about cats, but none for cats? Well, wonder no more as here is the first web site designed for a cat to use! featuring such feline goodies as Butterflies, mice, birds, bats, bees, and groundhogs. And if you look further into the site, at the pages that are designed for humans, you can find other feline themed amusements. My favourite is: where you can smoosh a picture of a kitty and give him weird eyes and a long nose and visit other such atrocities upon helpless photos of kitties.

So that's pretty much all for today. The very tall kid went to school today because he's pretty much recovered from his wisdom tooth ordeal. And the oldest son has received all his official papers and will officially graduate from high school. He finished in first semester a year ago but they have the ceremony once a year so he had to wait. He will be receiving an "Ontario Scholar" Award which means he kept an 80+ average all five and a half years he was in high school. I think it also means money for college or university. We think it's 200$ but we aren't sure. That's so cool, isn't it!

See ya later!


Posted by lincatz at 9:23 AM EDT
Updated: Sunday, 16 October 2005 11:21 AM EDT
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Wednesday, 6 July 2005

Mood:  don't ask
Topic: Cats, Catz and Kats

I have my time of the month. I'm on the rag. It's time for a visit from my old aunt Flo. Yeppers! It's time for my period! Isn't that wonderful? Aren't you glad that I shared that with you? Sort makes following my on line journal worth while, doesn't it? All this amazing world wide wanker technology...just for me to announce to the world that I have my period!

I have only one link today, it's an old a tired link, but it is still a link and because it involves cats, I am compelled to share it with you! Cat Fights! No not THAT type of cat fight! This site has videos of cats fighting. If you have ever owned a cat, you know that they aren't always the most sociable animals, even if the two cats have grown up together. They will often begin fighting for no reason other than one stepped on the others shadow, or one looked at the other the wrong way....This website has videos of cats engaged in territorial disputes. Let the fur fly!

So what else is new in the litter box? Not much...Yesterday my kid downloaded a DOS emulator that works much better than the whatzit in windows that is supposed to let you use older programs. We now have several older but goodies type games stuffed into this emulator now. My all time favourite DOS game is "Boppin'" a game that defies categorization. Is it a puzzle? Is it a strategy? Is it a maze? Yes! And it's more! I got the full version, complete with level editor so I can make my own levels if I so choose! We used to have the shareware version of the game and now we have the full version. It came from a place called "Home of the underdogs" a site that specializes in old out of date software, much unsupported my the makers, some the companies no longer exist, and some is what is termed "Abandonware" So I spent some of yesterday shooting boppin blocks at puzzle pieces! Cool or what?

According to the morning news, London England just got the Olympics for 2012. I will be 51 years old. Yikes! I hope I'll have gone through menopause by then! Once again...I manage to make it about me!

I forgot to mention Live 8, the big music festival to raise awareness about poverty in Africa. I didn't need a rock concert, I've been aware of African poverty for along time now. And the world has been giving money to Africa for twenty years, or longer, and it hasn't made a rat's ass worth of difference. Excuse me for being cynical, but it seems too much charitable help is going to line the pockets of petty dictators to fund their wars, riots, genocides...and the ordinary people who need the help can't get it because of government and military blockades, inability to pay government bribes distribution fees...and I always remember the Live Aid...ten years later film which showed rotting sacks of food and rusting farm equipment...all with the live aid logo...all rotting in makeshift warehouses. All the help sent to Ethiopia left the country 's economy dependant on foreign charitable aid...that's not right. Africa needs to solve its problems from within...to get rid of civil wars and territorial wars, to show strong leadership, which is not dictatorial leadership...the country will only solve it's problems through equal distribution of its own resources, and that means small grass roots development that included the ordinary people who benefit the most, not high level IMF and World Bank type projects that benefit big businesses and line the government coffers without a single dollar reaching the people who are the poorest. And now I will climb off my soap box! You asked for my opinion and you got it!

Did I mention I'm making another purse? This one is from pebbly textured black distressed leather. It looks as if it's already been used for a long time in something else....but it is new because I'm cutting it fresh from a skin. I also have enough to make a pair of leather gloves. I have a pattern and it's quite complex, especially sticking the thumb into the gusset...there are about four seams and three pivot points on just the thumb. The leather is a bit tougher than the soft garment sueded I used for the blue purse. My machine grunts and groans a bit more, but so far so good. If I turn the stitch length to the longest then the leather feeds through quite nicely. I'm using ordinary Gutterman long staple polyester thread and it also seems to be working. I have a 110 (thick) cutting point needle in the machine, the point has a special point that cuts through the leather, so it does some of the work and puts less stress on the motor. I will work on it again later today.

The heat wave has broken...we get a couple days of cool clear, unpolluted air, then it's back into the steam bath. There were 26 days in June with poor quality air here in Ontario. No wonder I had a sore throat last week! That's far too many days of bad air.

That's enough for today! Later!


Posted by lincatz at 9:12 AM EDT
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Wednesday, 4 May 2005

Mood:  hug me
Now Playing: Classic rock..the Hawk-FM is now on line!
Topic: Cats, Catz and Kats

My favourite radio station, the Hawk from Woodstock is once again on-line. I know, it's been on-line for a few years but for some reason it HATED my computer. Now it likes my computer again. I hate radio stations that require you to download extra streaming media software, which is nothing more than spyware in many cases! I don't mind the ninety minute limit, like 103.5 has, it serves as a reminder of how long I've been noodling on the computer and maybe it's time to get off and do something else.

Speaking of the not-so-great outdoors, it snowed yesterday afternoon! It snowed...in MAY! may is supposed to be sunny and warm, with flowers blooming and buds bursting and birds twittering...this year the flowers are staying in their buds, the trees have decided to remain dormant and the only sound from the birds is the sound of chattering beaks and knocking knees because they are shivering in their nests! WILL THIS WINTER EVER END?!?!?!?

But for now....I have a few serious things to talk about. Such as cats. Cats are very serious animals and deserve all the dignity and respect that we, as their human companions can offer them. Which is why Stuff on My Cat is such an important addition to the world of felines on the web. It tackles the very important issue of "Exactly how much stuff can I put on my cat while it sleeps?" Apparently one can place a sleeping toddler on a sleeping cat with no ill effects to either. Who of us hasn't placed stuff on their sleeping cat? My personal favourite thing to place on my cats while they sleep on the bed is laundry, fresh from the dryer. Trixie usually wakes up, Lucky occasionally snuggles in for a deeper sleep. I've never placed my breakfast on a sleeping cat, although obviously, it can be done!

And now for a little (not) racy and (not) adult content!Live! Nude! Cats! A site devoted to the finest unclothed felines on the internet! None of the cats on this site are wearing any clothes. And they are all living cats! The title page warns you that you must be eighteen or over to enter, but I think the site is safe for children over fourteen...most of the poses are quite artistic and the most explicit photos have the naughtiest bit pixilated...making them seem racier than they really are!

And if that isn't warm and fuzzy enough...how about: Rate my Kitten! and vote for your favourite warm fuzzy feline! Some are adorable...some are weird, many are sleeping!

Perhaps you don't like cats? Would it surprise you to know My Cat Hates You! This is a collection of the most spiteful, hate-filled cats on the internet. And they hate everyone. I couldn't find the picture of Lucky! He was a "My cat hates you" cat several years ago! These little darlings wouldn't hesitate to claw, hiss and spit every time you attempt to take their picture! the perfect antidote to the cuties of rate my kitten.

Time to mention one of my favourite places for cat graphics. Many of these are used to adorn my web pages and message board postings. Cat Stuff! is a great place to find bunches of them. This is one I got from there, and I also got instruction on how to turn it int a "Mystery Meat Menu" which I likely won't do.

Another great cat graphics site is Blue Cat Graphics with desktop themes, IM themes and Firefox themes. Nothing like a computer that meows!

And now for a touch of class...what's classier than the theater? How about:Claw Theater: Thespian Felines! For your entertainment...plays performed by cats.

You have a natural
charisma that draws
many to you.
or could it be
your fine rack?
Billy's Weird...cat...thing tells your fortune!

And as we all know...cats are psychic! just look at what Billy's weird cat said about me!

Put "weird cat" into google and this is the second thing that comes up:Cats are Weird People! There is a strange cult that wants to clutter up the internet with photos of cats. Before long...all bandwidth will be used up by people exchanging photos of cats! This madness must stop! But not until after I post a couple pictures of my kitties!

I think that's more then enough for now!


Posted by lincatz at 10:24 AM EDT
Updated: Wednesday, 4 May 2005 12:03 PM EDT
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